Saturday, May 21, 2016

The Abridged SciFi List: TV Edition


This is The Abridged SciFi List: TV Edition.
Each has a photo and a ten second synopsis. The photos are just pictures of the main character cast - basically the worst photos I could have chose for this sort of thing - because frak you that's why.

Star Trek 

A western based in outer-space
Alien of the week
Space Madness
Energy beings
Time travel out the wazoo





Star Trek: The Next Generation

A western based in outer-space but with tree hugging and friendship for communism
Alien of the week
Space Madness
Energy beings
Sometimes some science stuff, gadget stuff
FREAKING SPACE ZOMBIES
(Star Trek fictional universe)


Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

Drama based in outer-space
Alien of the week
Space Madness
Energy beings
Sometimes some science stuff, gadget stuff, religious overtones  
Politics based on World War II
FREAKING SPACE ZOMBIES
(Star Trek fictional universe) 

Star Trek: Voyager

Gilligan's Island based in outer-space
Alien of the week
Space Madness
Sometimes some science stuff, gadget stuff
FREAKING SPACE ZOMBIES
(Star Trek fictional universe)









Star Trek: Enterprise

A western based in outer-space but with time travel out the wazoo
Tried so hard
Got so far
But in the end, it didn't even matter
Gadgets and stuff
References to other Star Treks
FREAKING SPACE ZOMBIES








Babylon 5

Kinda like if Deep Space Nine and The X-Files had a baby, but it came first
There's not really a huge rift between Star Trek and Star Wars fans like everyone who isn't a nerd wants there to be, but damn Babylon 5 fans used to strait up murder Star Trek fans like Bloods and Crips in a lock-in at the community center.




Alien Nation

Police procedural
Aliens come to Earth and are regular butt heads like everyone else.
They're all bald and speckled and get drunk off of milk.


Space: Above and Beyond

I'm not really sure - it's like space battles and aliens and stuff and it's pretty good and I wish they would bring it back but not as a reboot because I hate those just keep the old story and add on to it dammit stop re-hashing stuff and write!









The X-Files

Monster of the week and/or government conspiracies, in that order.
(X-Files fictional universe)








Millennium


Crime procedural
The X-Files Jr. Government conspiracies and/or monster of the week, in that order.
(X-Files fictional universe)









The Lone Gunman

I think that there was some computer hacking and conspiracy stuff
(X-Files fictional universe)


Freaky Links

Really wanted to be The X-Files.
People investigated creepy stuff
(X-Files fictional universe)












Harsh Realm

There was like a government virtual reality thing that broke and went crazy and some people gt stuck in there and that's about it
(X-Files fictional universe)













Earth: Final Conflict

Aliens come to Earth and claim that they wanna be friends
There's some conspiracy stuff and general action shootout stuff but with sometimes aliens and sometimes monster of the week.
The Roddenberry are responsible for this, but it's not in the Star Trek fictional universe




Farscape

If The X-Files and Star Trek had a baby
Pretty good






Stargate: SG1

Claims to be based on the movie
Lots of action, decent story arc
Alien of the week sometimes
Conspiracy stuff sometimes
Star Trek actors sometimes
Kinda like Star Trek in that they go to other planets
References to MacGyver in the blooper reels
(Stargate fictional universe)
"Aim High"

Stargate: Atlantis 

Like Stargate: SG1 if it was all nerds















Not a TV show, but I'm putting this here anyway. I'll do one for each episode if I ever do part two of this list.

The Star Wars Franchise

A conglomeration of Samurai stories, pirate stories, The Godfather, and Lord of the Rings, set in space, with swords that are like lasers for some reason. Also, space combat and a big "ultimate power" weapon, so basically World War II
(Star Trek fictional universe - and I can prove it, so suck it!)

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Coping with the I.T. Department

Do you get along with your I.T. Department? I'm spending my 9 to 5 these days as a supervising network engineer. Maybe reading this will take some stress away from your day when you have a computer problem, and have to reach out to the I.T. Department.

Here are some things to consider:

First, the computer: 
For many people, when they see a computer, something in their brain shuts off. I'm talking about intelligent people who know how to behave around a computer, or can learn how to behave around a computer, but some Pavlovian prank occurs in their brain that prevents them from doing so. So what can we do about this?

Picture, if you will, a VCR. (If you're too young to know what a VCR is, or remember having one in your home, you're probably not who this section is intended for. If you'd like to follow along anyway, picture a DVD player instead. Didn't have a DVD player? How about a Wii U, Xbox One, or PS4? A Television? A microwave?) The VCR sat on top of your television set (that's the fat kind, not the flat kind) plugged in to the wall for electricity, and the TV to get it's signal onto your screen. The VCR got its signal from either an antenna inside or outside, or cable, or a satellite dish, so it was plugged into probably another box or another spot on the wall. As long as all of the cords were plugged in and not faulty, and there was electricity, and your TV was on the right channel, you would at least get a picture on your screen. Want to watch a movie? Pop a tape in there and hit play. Life is good.

But that's a lot of conditions already just for a VCR, isn't it? Power in, signal in, signal out, TV/VCR mode, tuner mode, power to the TV, TV channel, the tape itself, tracking, did you hit play?

Suddenly, the VCR seems pretty complicated - but it didn't seem that way when you were recording Magnum P.I., did it? Sadly, the majority of problems are caused by things not being plugged in. But that's not really even what important. Here's what's important. You wouldn't kick your VCR so hard that it tumbles onto the floor several times over a two or three week period, and then blame the VCR repair man when he says it was damaged by the kicks and falls since it worked after the other five times you kicked it onto the floor? But that happens. Your desktop at work bulk ordered from Dell is not one of those hardened military laptops that are designed to survive war - it's the cheapest damn thing your company could buy that would actually work. Also, if you ever had a collection of potted plants on your VCR, and then blamed the VCR repair man when the VCR broke and when he opened it, potting soil and dead leaves fell out, and there were obvious signs of water damage, please stop reading this and promptly kick yourself in the ass - FIRMLY. I've found this, and other disgusting things, inside computers that were "running just fine" yesterday "so it couldn't possible be all this garbage I let get in it since I've been letting garbage get in it for ages!"

So be at least as gentle with your computer as you would a VCR.

Second, The Help Ticket System:
If your company has a help ticket system, use it! Don't try to get in the front of the line with a phone call or email. Here's why: The I.T. department is busy! Even if nothing breaks there is a lot of work that needs to be done to keep things running - especially if your company has any sort of compliance (I'm looking at you schools, healthcare providers, and/or any company doing business with any government entity). You're rolling your eyes right now, aren't you? Almost all of the work a network tech/admin/engineer does, even if it's on equipment in another state, is done from his or her desk. Desktop techs/admins, on the other hand, will be up and about more often, but even in the right set-up, they can get everything done from their seat. So just because you don't ever see the person leave their office, doesn't mean that they're not busy.

Oh, that's not why you were rolling your eyes, is it? It's because you know that you can get the I.T. department to handle your stuff first if you just show up in their office or call them, isn't it? Well, then that's the I.T. department's fault, but by order of management, that doesn't fly where I work.

Finally, the annoying questions:
Every dang time I talk to I.T., they ask a million boring questions and I JUST WANT THEM TO FIX IT! Well... WE'RE TRYING, DAMNIT! That's what the questions are for. And I know some of you feel like when we're asking these questions, it's because we don't believe you. That's not the case. It's not like fixing a flat tire where you can just say "The tire is flat" and the repair person will say "Okay we'll replace it with a new one". They never ask "When did the tire become flat? Where were you driving when it happened? How fast were you going? Has it happened before? Was it just one tire or all four? Did the other people you could see on the street also get flat tires?" Wouldn't it be nice if computers were like tires, and we could just fix them without knowing what was wrong?

But computers are not like tires. If you have a problem, and tell us that it's happening to everyone, you're not only going to get a faster response, you're going to get a faster response of us looking in the absolute wrong direction, which means that it will take longer to fix. If it's just your computer (as far as you know), and you tells us that, then we will probably know where to look first, and you'll be fixed in a matter of minutes instead of hours. We need to know when it started in order to find a correlation with other events - either in firewall logs, or workstation logs, or maintenance logs, or maybe there is no correlation, and it's an isolated event.

And finally, the most annoying question of all is when we ask you to show us. Maybe it's a website that doesn't do what it's supposed to. Well, we're going to ask to see it. Maybe an error message comes up when you're running a program. Not only do we want to see the error message, we want to see exactly what you did when the message appeared. This is called replicating the problem and is the absolute crux of any troubleshooting process, whether it be cars, mechanics, or even I kid you not sometimes the doctor will tell you to move your elbow in the way that causes pain when you tell her that moving your elbow a certain way causes pain. Replicating the problem allows us to see a lot of other details that you may not have picked up on. To no fault of your own, of course! We're the ones trained to look for these things.

So back to the website example: I'm going to either be sitting next to you with my own laptop, or connected to your computer via remote access. I'll ask you to click that thing that didn't work again, and while you plainly see that it's not working, I'm also checking for any indication on your screen, watching your event viewer from my computer, and probably watching traffic cross (or get blocked by) the firewall in real time. Was the problem with your computers operating system, browser, browser plugin like Adobe, Flash, ActiveX, Java, or your antivirus? Or maybe it was actually something interrupted by a faulty switch or router. Or maybe the firewall detected an unsafe element on that page and has decided to block it.  Maybe there's a problem with the Internet Service Provider's connection? Or Domain Naming Service? Or the web server it self? I once had a director call me at home at 8PM because she was being "blocked" to a certain website and wanted me to fix it immediately when it turned out the owner of the website she was visiting hadn't paid their damn website bill and the hosting company took the website down until they paid the next morning!

So yes, we're going to ask you to show us the thing, whatever it is, not working. And yes, we're going to ask you to do this multiple times while we change certain variable to get a solution working. No, it's not because we don't believe you, and no, you don't have to cooperate if you really don't want to - only cooperate if you want us to be able to fix your problem.

Honestly, there are a lot of jobs computer science degrees or various computer certifications can get you in to, and many people go into Information Technology (i.e. support) because they enjoy helping people. We want to fix the thing that isn't working. Help us help you.

Hopefully, if you've read this entire rant, you'll be able to take a deep breathe and work with the I.T. crew in order to have a less stressful experience. Because that's what I want. I want you, the end-user, to have a less stressful day. Aren't I nice?

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Toddler killed at Mumbai Train Station - An Open Letter to The BBC

TO: yourpics@bbc.co.uk

(an open letter)

Sir/Madam,

Approximately seven days ago, very disturbing footage has emerged on various social networks depicting the tragic death of a toddler - a girl who appeared between two and four years of age.

Tragically, this girl was run over by the train.

It is not clear what happened to the child, although I think it's safe to assume she did not survive.

I understand that there are many orphans who call this train-station home, and that these types of tragedies are commonplace in that part of the world, but i feel that if the BBC brings this issue to light, then perhaps there is a chance that some sort of change will come about - maybe change that could prevent these kinds of things from happening again.



Ever since I've seen the footage, I cannot get the idea of this frightened child - a baby, really - out of my mind. How did she end up there? Was she playing around near the tracks? Did she venture down there with a hungry stomach to retrieve some food? Did she see some sort of rubbish that looked appealing to her (A brightly colored candy wrapper, for instance, could be enticing to a homeless toddler with no play things of her own). What was going through her head when she found herself under the train? Was she frightened, did she think she was going to die? Was she thinking of her mother? Did she have a mother to think of? Was she really an orphan, or were her parents among the terrified on lookers frantically calling to the child?

The bottom line is, this child met a tragic and wholly preventable end - and unless any drastic change occurs, more innocent children will parish this way.

As one of, if not the only, remaining trusted news sources in the world, I believe that the BBC has the privilege and requirement of bringing these types of events into the mainstream conversation - not for sensationalism, but so that these things are not swept under the rug, but brought into the open. Public discussion may be the first step towards preventing future tragedies like this one.

That child - who's name I don't even know - is in my thoughts and prayers.

Sincerely,

Tony F. Scardina

P.S. I have not included a link to this video because it is so disturbing. However, searching for "baby killed in Mumbai train station" on any video sharing website (I suggest LiveLeak which had the video as of yesterday) will provide you with the shocking footage and audio. To any one who watches: brace yourself.

Friday, May 17, 2013

I like Cessna just fine




Do you know what a Cessna looks like? Would you know one if you saw one?

Cessna 150 II
Cessna 172


Cessna 182

Cessna 210

Cessna Caravan


Cessna A-37 Dragonfly
Cessna Mustang



Cessna Citation X



































Sunday, April 7, 2013

List of Star Trek Klaxons

SUPER O.C.D. NERD MODE GO!

It seems there is not a comprehensive list of alarms on the ships from Star Trek. I'm not going to upload the sounds, because I don't have time, and it might draw the ire of copyright lawyers.

These alarms change from time period to time period depending on what Starfleet R&D finds to be the most effective, so while the alerts themselves may not change, the audio accompanied by them will.

Boatswain's Whistle

Aural cue used to signify that the commanding officer, executive officer, or acting commanding officer of a vessel or base is about to address personnel via the public address system.

Condition Green


Aural and visual cues to signify that a higher alert status has been canceled. Momentary aural and visual cues.

Yellow Alert


Aural and visual cues to signify that a yellow alert has been declared. Usually followed by computer aural warning. Typically defensive shields are activated, hatches sealed, and typically shuttle bat doors closed. Some personnel report to particular duty stations. Momentary aural and continuous visual cues.

Red Alert


Aural and visual cues to signify that a red alert has been declared. By policy, followed by verbal instruction from the officer that declared the alert status via public address systre. Defensive shields are activated, hatches sealed, and typically shuttle bat doors closed. All hands report to battle stations. Weapon systems (directed energy weapons, such as phasers, and torpedo systems, such as photon or quantum  powered and armed. All hands report to particular duty stations. Momentary aural and continuous visual cues.

Intruder Alert


Aural cues indicating an intruder. Momentary aural cues. Can be triggered automatically or manually.

Proximity Alert


Aural cues indicating an object within predetermined proximity. Momentary aural cues, usually localized to command area (bridge, operations, etc.). Can be triggered automatically or manually.

Blue Alert


Aural and visual cues to indicate any of the following conditions: Docking maneuvers, hull separation maneuver, landing maneuver. Momentary aural and continuous visual cues.

Evacuation Signal

Localized Aural warning to evacuate a particular area. Commonly heard in engineering sections. Can be triggered automatically or manually. Continuous aural cues.

Abandon Ship


Similar to evacuation signal. Aural and visual cues to abandon ship followed with verbal instruction. Can be triggered automatically or manually. Continuous aural cues.

General Warning Tone (almost exclusivly seen in latter TNG, DS9, and VOY)

A tone used to indicate a problem. Generally used in conjunction with a control panel (i.e. speed warning on helm controls). Usually accompanied by computer aural warning. Typically heard during audible self destruct countdown. Can be momentary or continuous. 

And while I'm here, I might as well address the two types of self destruct these ships have. Every Star Trek fan knows that a ship's main power source is a "warp reactor core" fueled by matter/anti-matter reactions, but many fans do not know that these ships also have fusion reactors to supplement the reactor core. Generally, when a crew decides to scuttle the ship, the self-destruct mechanism will detonate the fusion reactors, resulting in almost complete destruction of the ship, with minimal collateral damage. When the ship itself is to be used as a weapon, instead of, or in addition to detonating the fusion reactors, the entire supply of deuterium and anti-deuterium will flood the engineering section causing a much more massive explosion (similar to a warp core breach, but intentionally creating the largest possible destructive yield). This causes far greater collateral damage, which may prove beneficial in combat as a last resort, but will cause far greater collateral damage and fallout.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Nuclear Eggs



I've been undergoing a battery of tests to find out why my bowels are inflamed, and what inflammatory bowel disease I have. My favorite so far is the gastric follow-through. This is because when I arrived at the hospital, I was shown to a room called "Nuclear Medicine", and fed a breakfast of NUCLEAR EGGS!

Basically, it was scrambled eggs on toast with a cup of ice water. The secret ingredient? Technetium-99m. 99mTc  is a radioactive isotope of Technetium, and is used in tens of millions of diagnostic procedures each year (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Technetium-99m). I even got this spiffy card to show to the TSA should I set off a radiation detector at the airport.



That got me to thinking - I wonder if I would make one of those Geiger counters go "clicky clicky clicky"? Now, if only I had a Geiger counter. 

Well, as it turns out, I do (sort of). You see, a Geiger tube is not the only thing that can detect the 140,000 electron-Volt gamma particles that comes spewing out of this stuff. A type of sensor called a complimentary metal-oxide semiconductor can detect these as well. Turns out these CMOS sensors are the sensors located in cellphone cameras. So maybe if I blocked out the visible light with a piece of plastic or something, only the  high energy photons of gamma rays would penetrate all the way to the detector. Now, if only I could write a program that could convert that information to a meaningful micro Civert count. 

OH WAIT, SOME ONE ALREADY DID!



So, I downloaded the app, had Brandi (who hasn't been irradiated today) calibrate it, and tested it out. Now, I realize that this isn't exactly scientific equipment, but it will at least show relative differences between sources. 

The room we were in produced about 12CPM.

Brandi produced 17CPM.

A bunch of seven bananas produced 48CPM. (Bananas are radioactive. Look it up)

And Tony for the win, produced 115CPM! In fact, the numbers on the display all turned red, indicated an unsafe dosage. BUWAHAHAHA!

To be honest, it only produced that high count when the sensor was directly over a specific part my abdomen. The rest of my body produced about a dozen CPM. 

Now before you start saying "DUDE, HOW CAN A PHONE MEASURE RADIATION?", remember that Android phones all have a magnetometer, three accelerometers  a GPS, one or more cellular transceivers, a Bluetooth transceiver, a WiFi transceiver, and an unspecified number of thermometers, and then go read up on ionizing radiation, gamma ray radiation, nuclear decay, high-z particles, Geiger counters, Technetium-99m, and CMOS CCD sensors, and THEN feel free to say stupid things. 

Also, nuclear farts. I've been ripping them all day. 





Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Softmod Wii Quick, Fast, and In A Hurry

Another post from Dimitri. (DISCLAIMER: I do not condone or encourage any of the activities or actions described in this third-party blog post):

Things you'll need:
Nintendo Wii 
WiFi and Internet connection for aforementioned Wii
A 4GB SD card and an external USB drive with at least 16GB
.          -OR- 
A 16GB SD card
Format SD cards and/or USB drives in any one of the following formats:
*FAT
*FAT32
*NTFS
Avoid exFAT, WBFS, ext1, ext2, ext3, CDFS, or any other formats not listed.


I went from not owning a Nintendo Wii to having one fully modded playing free games (homebrew and Wii) in about fours hours time, but it only took that long because of all the trial and error. Tony's says my last post on his blog was pretty since for some of his classmates, friends and family always asked these questions on the Internet without really getting any good information. So, here's what to do.